Let’s face it: by the time most authors get their groove on (oh wow –
*slap* on the wrist, Bad Girl, for that telling expression) they aren’t
spring chickens. From stats I’ve seen, most authors get their first
book published in their 50s or 60s. I was 49, I think. (The first
novel came after 40 short stories.)
But publishers would have it different. It’s the old, “I want a 21 year
old with a PHD and 15 years experience” syndrome. It’s a crummy fact.
Younger authors are better for a house than older authors, as said
older authors will not have as many writing years left. My agent told
me that I was ‘okay’ at 49. Had I been older, his advice was “keep it
to yourself. And keep dyeing the hair.”
So it’s in an author’s interest not to appear retirement age. Why,
then, do so many mature but newbie writers give themselves away?
No need to be careless. Here’s the advice I give my Crafting a Novel Students:
Names: Recently, I read a mystery book where the protagonist was named
Dorothy. She was supposed to be 35 years old. Now, I may be over 35.
(Okay, by a good 20 years.) *No* one in my age group was named
Dorothy. In fact, I don’t know a Dorothy under age 65. What I *do*
know is something about the author. Not only must she be over 65 (and
she is), but she didn’t do her research.
Helen, Jean, Phyllis, Mildred: That’s my mother’s generation.
Linda, Debbie, Carol, Cathy: Baby Boomers
Tiffany, Jennifer, Alex, Natalie, Caitlin: Echo-Boom
You can look them up online (popular names for each decade.) And okay,
it’s not a hard and fast rule. But when we see certain names, they
automatically bring to mind people of a certain age. Yes, someone can
be named after a grandmother. But unless you explain it (or describe
the person immediately) we are going to have a picture in our minds.
What it does reveal in painful technicolor (*slap* again) is that the
author is a generation or two older than her protagonist. Do you want a
publisher to know that? No you don’t.
Cell phone: If you are writing a current day novel, your protagonist is
gonna be glued to her cell phone. And she won’t be phoning. Nope, she
is going to be texting like crazy. I am blown away by the number of
older authors who have their 30 year old protagonists picking up the
cell every five minutes to *talk* to someone. Really? Do you *know*
any 30 year olds? Talking on the phone went out with cassette tapes and
big hair. Young folk don’t call anymore. Only their fingers work. In
my latest book Crime Club (which is YA) my teens use dialogue in
person, but text each other as soon as they are alone. Yes, in a book.
You can make it interesting. But for Gawd sake, make it real.
And about time settings: If you are writing a book that takes place in
the 60s 70s or 80s, you are immediately dating yourself. Yes, it’s
convenient not to have to worry about cell phones. But publishers tell
us there isn’t a market for books set in those decades yet. Historical
ends at 1950 so far. So if you are writing in those decades mentioned,
we all know you are probably a nostalgic 60 plus type.
Music: If your protagonist is 20, and she is bouncing along to Glass Tiger, or
Fine Young Cannibals (my music) you had better find a way to explain
it. That’s what her parents listened to. Even worse, the Beatles.
That’s almost grandparents. Regularly, I find 65 year old writers
having their 30 year old protagonists listening to music that went out
in the 70s. And I hear authors say, when I question them, “Maybe she’s
into retro.” Yeah, and maybe the author is 65 years old and doesn’t
know what is current.
Do what I did in The Goddaughter. Research what is current. Gina’s smartphone sings “Shut Up and Drive.”
Final words: In class last term, I was explaining the above phone choice I made for Gina back some years ago, and couldn’t remember the name of the artist
who sang the song. One of my students said, “I’ll ask Siri.” A minute
later, she was giggle like crazy. “I put in ‘Shut up and Drive’,” she
told the class. “Siri answered: ‘That’s not very nice’.”
Welcome to our Brave New World.
Bonus for the eagle eyed: Can anyone pick out the no-no in my post above? (I'll leave in the comments toward the end of the day.)
THE ANSWER: repeated here as well as below. Note the double spaces after the periods in the post above. Obviously written by someone who learned on a typewriter. Before sending off a manuscript, I always use the Word Replace function to replace two spaces with one. Ta-da! Young again. *winks at Leigh*
Just out! That book where the teens text each other...CRIME CLUB.
The Number One Gifted Book on Amazon.ca -
A perfect gift for the teen or tween in your family.
"Scooby Do meets the Sopranos"
link to CRIME CLUB
Showing posts with label Melodie Campbell. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Melodie Campbell. Show all posts
23 November 2019
Authors, Don’t Give Away Your Age! (at least not inadvertently) Bad Girl gripes again
Labels:
Melodie Campbell
Location:
Oakville, ON, Canada
26 October 2019
Writing as Salvation (a serious post just to prove that Bad Girl isn't always flaky
This year has been a test of anyone's sanity. In the winter, my beloved husband died painfully of
cancer. I want to roar like a bear in fury just thinking about it. He wasn't retirement age yet. This kick to our life plan put my own life at risk. Was it worth it? Was anything in this world worth living for now?
The first three months were like walking through a stage play, where everyone had a script but me. I was haunted by the way he had died and my helplessness to make much of a difference. Guilt can be tied to helplessness in a strange and not exactly rational way. I was alive, where he wasn't given the chance. And I didn't appreciate it, this life. I felt guilty for that.
My two grown-up daughters kept me going during this time.
About month four, I had a strange feeling. I'd been through this before. Not the exact situation. But the quite similar emotion of things being out of control, overwhelming, too much to handle.
When I was a young girl, my sweet little brother was sick. Or so we called it. Later, they gave it the label of autism. Our house was one of sadness, and at times, fear. I sought ways to escape. And the very best way, I found, was through creating stories.
The characters in my stories did what I said. I gave them wonderful adventures. But at the end of the day, they were under my control. That was it - pure, unfettered control, where in my own life, I had none.
As a kid, I started writing as a way to cope with an unstable home life. Could things be any more unstable than they were now?
I had no idea what to do with the rest of my life. No idea where to live. And with that, intense loneliness that had settled deep in my bones.
SALVATION: deliverance from harm, ruin or loss.
Writing - back then as now - has been my salvation. But not perhaps in the way that most people think. It's not that my prose allows me to reflect and write about my feelings as some form of therapy (although this does work in wondrous ways for some people.) Instead, it does the opposite. It takes me out of myself.
On those days where there doesn't seem to be much point to sticking around, this calling pokes at me. Get writing, it says. Write for other people - not yourself. Don't yield to the temptation to make this about you. Enough about you. Write for them.
I write humorous heists, epic fantasy and romantic comedy. Many of my books have been used in the ESL and literacy market, here and overseas. It took a long time, several months, for me to pull out of my grief to remember that. But the memories are starting to come back. In the back of my mind, a voice pokes through. That of a large man in his mid-thirties at a literacy event, saying to me, "If you hadn't written the Goddaughter books, I wouldn't be able to read now."
I'm making this year about him. Enough about me.
What about you, fellow writers and Sleuthsayers? Is writing crucial to maintaining sanity in difficult times?
No BSP this time. May we all touch someone with our writing.
The first three months were like walking through a stage play, where everyone had a script but me. I was haunted by the way he had died and my helplessness to make much of a difference. Guilt can be tied to helplessness in a strange and not exactly rational way. I was alive, where he wasn't given the chance. And I didn't appreciate it, this life. I felt guilty for that.
My two grown-up daughters kept me going during this time.
About month four, I had a strange feeling. I'd been through this before. Not the exact situation. But the quite similar emotion of things being out of control, overwhelming, too much to handle.
When I was a young girl, my sweet little brother was sick. Or so we called it. Later, they gave it the label of autism. Our house was one of sadness, and at times, fear. I sought ways to escape. And the very best way, I found, was through creating stories.
The characters in my stories did what I said. I gave them wonderful adventures. But at the end of the day, they were under my control. That was it - pure, unfettered control, where in my own life, I had none.
As a kid, I started writing as a way to cope with an unstable home life. Could things be any more unstable than they were now?
I had no idea what to do with the rest of my life. No idea where to live. And with that, intense loneliness that had settled deep in my bones.
SALVATION: deliverance from harm, ruin or loss.
Writing - back then as now - has been my salvation. But not perhaps in the way that most people think. It's not that my prose allows me to reflect and write about my feelings as some form of therapy (although this does work in wondrous ways for some people.) Instead, it does the opposite. It takes me out of myself.
On those days where there doesn't seem to be much point to sticking around, this calling pokes at me. Get writing, it says. Write for other people - not yourself. Don't yield to the temptation to make this about you. Enough about you. Write for them.
I write humorous heists, epic fantasy and romantic comedy. Many of my books have been used in the ESL and literacy market, here and overseas. It took a long time, several months, for me to pull out of my grief to remember that. But the memories are starting to come back. In the back of my mind, a voice pokes through. That of a large man in his mid-thirties at a literacy event, saying to me, "If you hadn't written the Goddaughter books, I wouldn't be able to read now."
I'm making this year about him. Enough about me.
What about you, fellow writers and Sleuthsayers? Is writing crucial to maintaining sanity in difficult times?
No BSP this time. May we all touch someone with our writing.
28 September 2019
Being a Goddess Sucks When your Characters Won’t Behave… (warning: more silly stuff from Bad Girl)
(Dave, are you smiling down on me? My comedy is back)
Recently, my characters have become more mouthy.
I like to think of myself as their creator. Goddess material. Without me, they wouldn’t have a life on the page, or anywhere, for that matter. This should buy me a certain amount of respect, I figure. Sort of like you might give a minor deity. After all, I have created five series for them to live in.
Unfortunately, my characters haven’t bought into that. Worse, they seem to have cast me into the role of mother. That’s me: a necessary embarrassment for the perpetuation of their lives. And like all kids, they squabble. They fight with each other for attention. I liken it to sibling jealousy.
To wit: “You haven’t written about me lately,” says Rowena, star of Rowena Through the Wall.
I try to ignore the petulance in her voice.
“Been busy,” I mumble. “Gina (The Goddaughter) had to get married in Vegas. And Del, a relative of hers, started a vigilante group.”
“I don’t care if she started a rock group. You’re supposed to be writing MY story.”
I turn away from the keyboard and frown at her. “Listen, toots. You wouldn’t have any stories at ALL if it weren’t for me. You’ve had three books of adventures with men. A normal gal would be exhausted. So please be patient and wait your turn. Jennie had to suck it up for Worst Date Ever. Del and The B-Team were next in line. You can be after that, maybe.”
Maybe. I wasn’t going to tell her about the 6th Goddaughter book currently in the works.
“It’s not fair. I came first! Before all those silly mob comedies,” Row whines. “Don’t forget! I was the one who got you bestseller status.” She points at her ample chest.
“Hey!” says Gina, fresh from cannoli central. “And which book won the Derringer and the Arthur Ellis? Not some trashy old fantasy novel.”
“Who are YOU calling trashy?” says Rowena, balling her hands into fists. “Just because my bodice rips in every scene…”
“Like THAT isn’t a plot device,” chides Gina.
“Oh, PLEASE don’t fight,” says Jennie, the plucky romance heroine of Worst Date Ever. “I just want everyone to have a Happy Ever After. Can’t you do that for us all, Mom? Er…Melodie?”
I look at Del, from The B-Team. “What do you think?”
Del shrugs. “Sounds sucky. What kind of crap story would that be? Bugger, is that the time? I got a second story job that needs doing. Cover for me, will you? And this time, let me know if the cops start sniffing around.”
“Cops?” says Gina. “Crap! I’m outta here.”
“Cops?” says Rowena. “There’s that little matter of a dead body in book 2…” She vanishes.
“Cops?” says Jennie, hopefully. “OH! Is one of them single?”
Book 15 is now out! THE GODDAUGHTER DOES VEGAS
(Don't tell Rowena…)
Labels:
characters,
comedy,
crime,
fantasy,
fiction,
humor,
humour,
Melodie Campbell,
romance
24 August 2019
VEGAS, BABY! In which Bad Girl explains how an imaginary Vegas hotel rocks the latest Goddaughter
Whether to use a real setting or make one up? That is the question.
Butchering Shakespeare aside (which I do cheerfully, if not cleverly)
all authors have to decide whether to set their novel in a real place or
not. There are advantages and
disadvantages to each.
In the Goddaughter series, I set the books in a real place –
Hamilton Ontario, also known as Steeltown, or The Hammer. Everyone who has ever been over the Skyway
bridge on the way to Toronto (one hour from Buffalo) will experience a taste of
Hamilton.
“I live in The Hammer.
Our skyline includes steel plants.
We consider smog a condiment,” says Gina Gallo, the mob goddaughter of
the series.
I don’t have to describe much to put you in that
setting. It’s sort of like New York or
Paris. Give a few landmarks we all know,
plus in this case assault your mouth and nose with metallic fumes, and the
author has put you there without endless sleep-inducing description.
The problem with using a real setting is you need to know
the place well, because if you make an innocent error, like forgetting that
some streets are one way, you will get hundreds of irate emails from readers
who know the place better than you do.
Luckily, I know Hamilton. I know where to buy the best cannoli (always
my test re how well you know a place.)
I use real settings whenever I can. Readers who live in the place love to see
their town highlighted. You can often
get local media interested in your book.
And people new to the location often get a kick out of coming to know
it, in a literal way.
So when I moved book 6 of the Goddaughter series to Vegas, I
had a dilemma. Here’s the thing. So many
people have been to Vegas, that you have to be very careful to ‘get it
right.’ I was there a few years ago, and
am very aware that things change.
It takes about 6 months for me to write a Goddaughter
book. Off it goes to the publisher, who
takes about 15-18 months to get it out to stores. That’s the thing about books. Anything on the shelves right now was
probably written two years ago.
In two years, things in Vegas change. Hotels redecorate, and maybe change
ownership. It became clear to me, that while I wanted this book to be clearly
‘Vegas,’ I needed to be careful. I’ve
stayed at the Mirage. I could have used
that as a base. But when writing the book, I couldn’t predict how things would
look there two years from now.
The answer? Create a
new hotel! Make it the newest and
hippest thing, so of course no one has seen it before. And that’s where I had fun. What hasn’t been done, I thought? What theme would present a whole lot of fun,
yet be completely whacky, in keeping with the Goddaughter series?
Whoot! It came to me
immediately. Hotel name: The Necropolis! Theme:
Morticia meets The Walking Dead.
We could ramp up the loopiness by throwing a Zombie convention. And then add a Viking Valhalla casino, a bar
called Embalmed, the Crematorium Grill steakhouse…
da book, on AMAZON |
So The Goddaughter Does Vegas is a hybrid. The setting is the Vegas you know. The hotel is a new concoction, but fitting
with the fantasy atmosphere that Vegas is famous for.
I got away with it this time. I think.
How about you? Do you
use real settings or do you make them up?
When reading, which do you prefer?
Labels:
convention,
fiction,
Las Vegas,
Melodie Campbell,
settings,
zombies
27 July 2019
Themes in Novels (in which Bad Girl discovers she’s not so flaky after all…)
One of the great discussions in the author world is whether
your book should have a theme or not. Of
course it’s going to have a plot. (Protagonist with a problem or goal and
obstacles to that goal – real obstacles that matter - which are resolved by the
end.) But does a book always have a
theme?
Got teen readers in your family? Here's the latest crime comedy, out this month:
Usually when we’re talking ‘theme’, we’re putting the story
into a more serious category. Margaret
Atwood (another Canadian – smile) tells a ripping good story in The Handmaid’s Tale. But readers would agree there is a serious theme underlying it, a warning, in effect.
Now, I write comedies.
Crime heists and romantic comedies, most recently. They are meant to be fun and
entertaining. So you can imagine my
surprise when I discovered recently that all of my books have rather serious
themes behind them.
Last Friday, I was interviewed for a CBC (Canadian
Broadcasting Corporation) mini-documentary featuring female Canadian crime
writers. During this, the producer got
me talking about the background to my most awarded series, The
Goddaughter. This crime caper series is
about a mob goddaughter who doesn’t want to be one, but keeps getting dragged
back to bail out her inept mob family.
I know what it’s like to be a part of an Italian family that
may have had ties to the mob. (In the
past. My generation is squeaky
clean.) The producer asked me If that
informed my writing. Of course it
did. But in our discussion, she stopped me
when I said: “You are supposed to love
and support your family. But what if
your family is *this* one?”
Voila. There it was:
a theme. All throughout the Goddaughter
series, Gina Gallo grapples with this internal struggle.
So then I decided to look at my other books. The B-team is a spin-off from The Goddaughter
series. It’s a funny take on The A-team
television series. A group of
well-meaning vigilantes set out to do good, but as this is comedy, things go
awry. In fact, the tag-line is: “They do
wrong for all the right reasons…and sometimes it even works.”
Was there a theme behind this premise? Was there a *question asked*? And yes, to me, it was clear.
In The B-Team, I play with the concept: Is it
ever all right to do illegal things to right a wrong?
Back up to the beginning.
My first series was fantasy.
Humorous fantasy, of course.
Rowena Through the Wall basically is a spoof of Outlander type
books. Rowena falls through a portal
into a dark ages world, and has wild and funny adventures. I wrote it strictly to entertain…didn’t
I? And yet, the plot revolves around the
fact that women are scarce in this time.
They’ve been killed off by war. I
got the idea from countries where women were scarce due to one-child
policies. So what would happen…I mused…if
women were scarce? Would they have more
power in their communities? Or would the
opposite happen. Would they have even less
control of their destinies, as I posited?
A very strong, serious theme underlying a noted “hilarious” book. Most readers would never notice it. But some do, and have commented. That gets this old gal very excited.
I’ve come to the conclusion that writers – even comedy
writers – strive to say something about our world. Yes, I write to entertain. But the life questions I grapple with find
their way into my novels, by way of underlying themes. I’m not into preaching. That’s for non-fiction. But If I work them in well, a reader may not
notice there is an author viewpoint behind the work.
Yes, I write to entertain.
But I’ve come to the conclusion that behind every novel is an author
with something to say. Apparently, I’m
not as flaky as I thought.
What about you? Do
you look for a theme in novels? Or if a
writer, do you find your work conforms to specific themes?
Got teen readers in your family? Here's the latest crime comedy, out this month:
On AMAZON
Labels:
B-team,
books,
CBC,
comedy,
goddaughter,
humor,
humour,
literary,
mafia,
Margaret Atwood,
Melodie Campbell,
mysteries,
theme,
themes,
writers
25 May 2019
Why I Chose a Traditional Publisher
Students often ask me why I don’t self-publish.
I try to slip by the fact that I was a babe when dinosaurs roamed the earth.
Meaning, I was writing long before self-publishing on Amazon and Nook etc. had even become an option.
Having a publisher and agent before self-publishing was a 'thing' has certainly made a difference, I'm sure. But now we have a choice.
Why do I still stay with a traditional publisher?
I try to slip by the fact that I was a babe when dinosaurs roamed the earth.
Meaning, I was writing long before self-publishing on Amazon and Nook etc. had even become an option.
Having a publisher and agent before self-publishing was a 'thing' has certainly made a difference, I'm sure. But now we have a choice.
Why do I still stay with a traditional publisher?
Gateway Endorsement
There’s no getting away from this: a traditional publisher, no matter how small,
is investing THEIR money to produce YOUR book.
They believe in your book so much that they are willing to risk their
own money to see it published.
What’s more, readers know this. They know that if your book has a publisher,
then it has gone through a gateway of sorts.
Someone in the business who knows about the book trade – someone other
than the writer - has determined that this book is worthy of being published.
They believe in your book.
That’s a huge endorsement.
You may believe in your book. I hope you do. And you may decide to self-publish it. That’s your choice. And it may be just as good as any book that is
released from a traditional publisher.
But the reader doesn’t know that. Further, they don’t know if you’ve already
sent the book to a dozen publishers and had it rejected. In many cases, they assume you’ve done just
that. They assume that no publisher wanted it.
Therefore, they figure they are taking a risk if they buy your book. And most readers don’t want to take risks
with their money. (Some will, bless
them. We love those
readers.)
Distribution and Promotion
Traditional publishers – particularly large or mid-size ones
– get your paperbacks into national bookstore chains. They will also include your book in their
catalogue to the big buyers, create sales info sheets for your book, and
perhaps buy ads. They arrange for industry reviews. We authors complain
they don’t do enough promotion. But they
certainly do these things that we can’t do.
We, as authors, can’t access the same distribution
networks. We can’t easily (if at all) reach the prominent
industry reviewers like Library Journal and Booklist.
And then there’s the whole problem of bookstores insisting
on publishers accepting returns. So if
your book doesn’t sell, your publisher has to pay the bookstore back the
wholesale price they paid for the book.
Independent authors can’t work that way.
We authors would go broke if we had to return money to every bookstore
that shelved our paperbacks but didn’t sell them.
Remember, you don’t get the book back.
The cover is sent back and the book is destroyed. Yes, this antiquated system sucks.
All the other crap
I’m an author. I want
to write. I don’t want to spend my
cherished writing time learning how to navigate Amazon’s self-publishing
program, and all the others. I don’t want to pay substantive and copy-editors
out of my own pocket. I don’t want to
seek out cover designers (although I admit that part might be fun.) I don’t want to pay a bunch of money upfront
to replace the work that publishers do.
If you self-publish, then you become the publisher as well
as the author. I asked myself: do I want
to be a publisher?
This was my decision, and you may choose a different one. You may love being a publisher. But I find it hard enough being an author. Adding all those other necessary factors to
the job just makes it seem overwhelming to me.
I may be a good writer. But I
have no experience as a publishing industry professional. I have no expertise. So I publish with the experts.
You may choose a different route. Just be aware that when you self-publish, you
become a publisher just as much as an author.
It’s all in how you want to spend your time.
Good luck on your publishing adventure, whichever way you choose to go!
That's The B-Team, a humorous heist crime book that is a finalist for the 2019 Arthur Ellis award, in the photo below. You can get it at B&N, Amazon and all the usual suspects.
ON Amazon
That's The B-Team, a humorous heist crime book that is a finalist for the 2019 Arthur Ellis award, in the photo below. You can get it at B&N, Amazon and all the usual suspects.
ON Amazon
Labels:
books,
Melodie Campbell,
professionalism,
publishing,
self-publishing,
writing
27 April 2019
Murder at the Crime Writing Awards (With the usual 'pee first' warning - see bottom)
Someone slipped up and made me a finalist in two
categories for the Arthur Ellis Awards for Crime Writing this year (The B-Team,
Novella, and A Ship Called Pandora, short story.) Naturally, I’m up against some of the best
(here’s looking at you, yet again, Twist Phalen.)
By strange coincidence, I’m also emceeing the awards
on May 23. Which goes to show how truly
confusing we can be in Canada. Because
you see, in days of yore (ten to three years ago) I was the one organizing the
gala, along with a team of truly wonderful but sweetly innocent individuals who
had no idea what they were signing up for.
The short list announcement yesterday got me
thinking about my first time organizing the event. I believe this may have also been my first
post on Sleuthsayers. Yes, that many
years ago. Time for a revisit. Warning: This is nonfiction. I swear.
MURDER AT THE CRIME WRITING AWARDS
Okay, I haven’t done it yet. But I may soon.
I’m the Executive Director of a well-known crime
writing association. This means I am
also responsible for the Arthur Ellis Awards, Canada’s annual crime writing
awards night, and the resulting banquet.
I’ve planned hundreds of special events in my career
as a marketing professional. I’ve
managed conferences with 1000 people attending, scarfing down three meals a
day. Usually, we offer a few choices,
and people choose what they want. They’re pretty good about that. People sit where they want. Simple.
Granted, most of my events have been with lab techs,
doctors, nurses, and other health care professionals.
It is not the same with authors. Nothing is simple with authors.
THE SEATING ARRANGEMENT
A can’t sit with B,
because A is in competition with B for Best Novel. C can’t sit with D because C is currently
outselling D. E can’t sit with F because
they had an affair (which nobody knows about.
Except they do. At least, the
seven people who contacted me to warn me about this knew.) G can’t sit with H
because G’s former agent is at that table and they might kill each other. And everyone wants to sit with J.
THE MENU
The damned meal is
chicken. This is because we are allowed
two choices and we have to provide for the vegetarians. We can’t have the specialty of the house, lamb,
because not everyone eats lamb. We can’t
have salmon as the vegetarian choice, because some vegetarians won’t eat fish.
So we’re stuck with
chicken again.
P writes that her
daughter is lactose intolerant. Can she
have a different dessert?
K writes that she is
vegetarian, but can’t eat peppers. Every
damned vegetarian choice has green or red pepper in it.
L writes that she wants
the chicken, but is allergic to onion and garlic. Can we make hers without?
M writes that her
daughter is a vegan, so no egg or cheese, thanks. Not a single vegetarian choice comes that
way.
I am quickly moving to
the “you’re getting chicken if I have to shove it down your freaking throat”
phase.
Chef is currently threatening the catering manager
with a butcher’s knife. I am already
slugging back the cooking wine. And by
the time people get here, this may be a Murder Mystery dinner.
Postscript:
Nobody got murdered, but a few got hammered.
Melodie Campbell’s caper novella The B-Team has been
shortlisted for the Arthur Ellis Award.
You can pick it up for a steal (sic) at Amazon, B&N, Chapters, and
all the usual suspects. Even Walmart,
because we’re a class act. Sometimes
even Zehrs. I’ll stop now.
The 'pee first' warning is given when humorous material follows. 'Nuf said.
Labels:
Arthur Ellis,
award ceremonies,
awards,
comedy,
Crime Writers of Canada,
crime writing,
galas,
humour,
Melodie Campbell
23 February 2019
ENDINGS: You Must Satisfy the Reader!
“Your first page sells the book. Your last page sells the next book.” — Mickey Spillane
In all my classes and workshops, we talk about satisfying the reader. As authors we make a ‘promise to the reader’. We establish this promise in the first few pages and chapters. Who will this story be about? What genre? Is it romance, mystery, thriller, western or one of the others? Readers are attached to different genres, whether we authors like it or not. We have to be aware that when we promise something, we need to fulfill it.
As an example: a thing that drives me crazy is when books are promoted as mysteries, and they are really thrillers. I like murder mysteries; my favourite book is an intelligent whodunit, with diabolically clever plotting. In a thriller, the plot usually centres on a character in jeopardy. Not the same.
As authors, we want to satisfy the reader, and that is exactly what Mickey Spillane was getting at in the quote above. To do this, we need to know what the reader expects. Here’s the handout I use in class to explain the different expectations in the main genres of fiction. (Note: there are always exceptions.)
ENDING EXPECTATIONS IN THE GENRES:
ROMANCE: The man and woman will come together to have a HEA (happy ever after) after surmounting great obstacles.
MYSTERY/Suspense: In a whodunit, the ending will reveal the killer. In a thriller, the protagonist will escape the danger. All loose ends will be tied up. Justice will be seen to be done in some manner. (This does not mean that the law will be satisfied. We’re all about justice here, and the most interesting stories often have characters acting outside the law to achieve justice. In mystery/suspense books you probably have the most opportunity for gray.)
FANTASY/Sci-Fi: The battle will be won for now, but the war may continue in future books. You should give your characters a HFN (happy for now) – at least a short amount of time to enjoy their
victory.
WESTERN: The good guy will win. Simple as that.
ACTION-ADVENTURE: The Bond-clone will survive and triumph. Sometimes the bad guy will get away to allow for a future story.
HORROR: Usually, the protagonist will survive. If not, he will usually die heroically saving others. Hope is key. If readers have lost hope, they will stop reading.
LITERARY: Again, the reader must be satisfied by the end of the story. The protagonist will grow from the challenge. He/she will probably be faced with difficult choices, and by the end of the story, the choice will be made. In other stories, it may be that by the end of the story the protagonist discovers something she has been seeking: i.e. The Progress of Love by Alice Munro
ENDINGS – The argument against using real life for your plot. (Why things that really happened to you don’t make good novels.)
“I am always telling my writing students that the anecdotes that make up their own lives, no matter how heart-wrenching they may have been for their subjects, are not in themselves stories. Stories have endings. Endings are contrived. In order to come up with a great ending, you’re probably going to have to make something up, something that didn’t actually happen. Autobiographical fiction can never do these things, because our lives contain few endings or even resolutions of any kind.” Russell Smith
Remember what we do: Fiction authors write about things that never happened and people who don’t exist. Remember what fiction writers must provide: The ending must satisfy the reader.
So: Don’t tell a publisher that your book/short story is based on real life. The publisher doesn’t care. They are only looking for a good story.
Melodie Campbell is the author of the multi-award-winning Goddaughter series. Book 6, The Goddaughter Does Vegas, is now available at all the usual suspects.
On AMAZON
In all my classes and workshops, we talk about satisfying the reader. As authors we make a ‘promise to the reader’. We establish this promise in the first few pages and chapters. Who will this story be about? What genre? Is it romance, mystery, thriller, western or one of the others? Readers are attached to different genres, whether we authors like it or not. We have to be aware that when we promise something, we need to fulfill it.
As an example: a thing that drives me crazy is when books are promoted as mysteries, and they are really thrillers. I like murder mysteries; my favourite book is an intelligent whodunit, with diabolically clever plotting. In a thriller, the plot usually centres on a character in jeopardy. Not the same.
As authors, we want to satisfy the reader, and that is exactly what Mickey Spillane was getting at in the quote above. To do this, we need to know what the reader expects. Here’s the handout I use in class to explain the different expectations in the main genres of fiction. (Note: there are always exceptions.)
ENDING EXPECTATIONS IN THE GENRES:
ROMANCE: The man and woman will come together to have a HEA (happy ever after) after surmounting great obstacles.
MYSTERY/Suspense: In a whodunit, the ending will reveal the killer. In a thriller, the protagonist will escape the danger. All loose ends will be tied up. Justice will be seen to be done in some manner. (This does not mean that the law will be satisfied. We’re all about justice here, and the most interesting stories often have characters acting outside the law to achieve justice. In mystery/suspense books you probably have the most opportunity for gray.)
FANTASY/Sci-Fi: The battle will be won for now, but the war may continue in future books. You should give your characters a HFN (happy for now) – at least a short amount of time to enjoy their
victory.
WESTERN: The good guy will win. Simple as that.
ACTION-ADVENTURE: The Bond-clone will survive and triumph. Sometimes the bad guy will get away to allow for a future story.
HORROR: Usually, the protagonist will survive. If not, he will usually die heroically saving others. Hope is key. If readers have lost hope, they will stop reading.
LITERARY: Again, the reader must be satisfied by the end of the story. The protagonist will grow from the challenge. He/she will probably be faced with difficult choices, and by the end of the story, the choice will be made. In other stories, it may be that by the end of the story the protagonist discovers something she has been seeking: i.e. The Progress of Love by Alice Munro
ENDINGS – The argument against using real life for your plot. (Why things that really happened to you don’t make good novels.)
“I am always telling my writing students that the anecdotes that make up their own lives, no matter how heart-wrenching they may have been for their subjects, are not in themselves stories. Stories have endings. Endings are contrived. In order to come up with a great ending, you’re probably going to have to make something up, something that didn’t actually happen. Autobiographical fiction can never do these things, because our lives contain few endings or even resolutions of any kind.” Russell Smith
Remember what we do: Fiction authors write about things that never happened and people who don’t exist. Remember what fiction writers must provide: The ending must satisfy the reader.
So: Don’t tell a publisher that your book/short story is based on real life. The publisher doesn’t care. They are only looking for a good story.
Melodie Campbell is the author of the multi-award-winning Goddaughter series. Book 6, The Goddaughter Does Vegas, is now available at all the usual suspects.
On AMAZON
Labels:
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genres,
happy endings,
HEA,
HFN,
Las Vegas,
Melodie Campbell,
Mickey Spillane,
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26 January 2019
Not another Freaking Neurotic Narrator (and other books....)
(reaches for the gun in her stocking, and yes that is me and a Derringer)
I'm tired of downer books. I don't want to be depressed after reading for three hours. Bear with me: I'll explain.
The problem is, most of the downer elements of grim books involve women who are victims. Either victims of crime, or victims of a patriarchal society. Scandinavian Noir is full of the first. In fact, most noir novels involve a female who is murdered and often hideously mutilated. That's so much fun for women to read.
So here goes:
I don't want to read any more books about women who are abused or downtrodden. I know there are several good books out there right now featuring such women. Some are historical. Some are current day. It's not that they aren't good. It's just that I don't want to read any more of them. I've read plenty.
Imagine, men, if most of the books you had read involved men who had been victimized or relegated to second class status by another gender. One or a few might be interesting to read. But a steady diet of these? Would you not find it depressing? Not to mention, discouraging?
I don't want to read any more books about neurotic women, or women who can't get it together. I dread more 'unreliable narrators.' Particularly, I don't want to read a book ALL THE WAY THROUGH, and then find out at the very end that the protagonist has been lying to me. (Are you listening, Kate Atkinson? *throws book across room*) Who wants to be tricked by the author? But there's something even worse about it:
Did you notice that most (okay, every single one I can think of) unreliable narrators on the bestseller lists recently are women? Does that say something to you about how society views women? (reaches for gun in stocking...) It does to me. No more 'girl' books. (BLAM!...that felt good.)
I don't want to read any more books this year with female protagonists that are written by men. Yes, this means some of the bestselling crime novels out there. They may be very well written. But these rarely sound like women's stories to me. They aren't written with the same lens.
What I want: books with intelligent female protagonists written by women. I want more women's stories. Books I can be proud to hand on to my daughters, and say, see what is possible? She isn't a victim! She's someone like you.
Trouble is, I can't FIND many books like that. The bestseller lists today are filled with protagonists who are unstable, neurotic women. Let me be clear: a lot of people enjoy these books. They may be very well written. They wouldn't be on bestseller lists otherwise.
But I'm tired of them. I want a ripping good story with a female protagonist, written by a woman. Hell, I want to *be* the protagonist for a few hours.
And not come away feeling downtrodden.
Speaking of which...if you're looking for a female protagonist with wit and brains, this mob goddaughter rocks the crime scene in a very different way:
The Goddaughter Does Vegas - out this week from Orca Book Publishers!
Book 6 in the multi-award winning caper series.
On AMAZON
I'm tired of downer books. I don't want to be depressed after reading for three hours. Bear with me: I'll explain.
The problem is, most of the downer elements of grim books involve women who are victims. Either victims of crime, or victims of a patriarchal society. Scandinavian Noir is full of the first. In fact, most noir novels involve a female who is murdered and often hideously mutilated. That's so much fun for women to read.
So here goes:
I don't want to read any more books about women who are abused or downtrodden. I know there are several good books out there right now featuring such women. Some are historical. Some are current day. It's not that they aren't good. It's just that I don't want to read any more of them. I've read plenty.
Imagine, men, if most of the books you had read involved men who had been victimized or relegated to second class status by another gender. One or a few might be interesting to read. But a steady diet of these? Would you not find it depressing? Not to mention, discouraging?
I don't want to read any more books about neurotic women, or women who can't get it together. I dread more 'unreliable narrators.' Particularly, I don't want to read a book ALL THE WAY THROUGH, and then find out at the very end that the protagonist has been lying to me. (Are you listening, Kate Atkinson? *throws book across room*) Who wants to be tricked by the author? But there's something even worse about it:
Did you notice that most (okay, every single one I can think of) unreliable narrators on the bestseller lists recently are women? Does that say something to you about how society views women? (reaches for gun in stocking...) It does to me. No more 'girl' books. (BLAM!...that felt good.)
I don't want to read any more books this year with female protagonists that are written by men. Yes, this means some of the bestselling crime novels out there. They may be very well written. But these rarely sound like women's stories to me. They aren't written with the same lens.
What I want: books with intelligent female protagonists written by women. I want more women's stories. Books I can be proud to hand on to my daughters, and say, see what is possible? She isn't a victim! She's someone like you.
Trouble is, I can't FIND many books like that. The bestseller lists today are filled with protagonists who are unstable, neurotic women. Let me be clear: a lot of people enjoy these books. They may be very well written. They wouldn't be on bestseller lists otherwise.
But I'm tired of them. I want a ripping good story with a female protagonist, written by a woman. Hell, I want to *be* the protagonist for a few hours.
And not come away feeling downtrodden.
Speaking of which...if you're looking for a female protagonist with wit and brains, this mob goddaughter rocks the crime scene in a very different way:
The Goddaughter Does Vegas - out this week from Orca Book Publishers!
Book 6 in the multi-award winning caper series.
On AMAZON
Labels:
crime fiction,
Melodie Campbell,
noir,
unreliable narrators,
Violence,
women
31 December 2018
The World Revolved and We Resolved
Happy
New Year! To celebrate the occasion some of the regular mob here
decided to offer a resolution for you to ponder. Feel free to
contribute your own in the comments.
It has been an interesting year at SleuthSayers and we hope it has been one for you as well. We wish you a prosperous and criminous 2019.
Steve Hockensmith. My new year's resolution is to write the kind of book that I would really enjoy reading but which will also have a decent chance of finding an enthusiastic publisher...which might be the equivalent of resolving to lose 30 pounds by only eating your favorite pizza.
Eve Fisher. Mine is to break my addiction to distracting myself on the internet.
John M. Floyd.
1.
Read more new authors.
2.
Write more in different genres.
3.
Let my manuscripts “cool off” longer before sending them in.
4.
Read more classics.
5.
Search out some new markets.
6.
Cut back on semicolons.
7.
Go to more conferences.
8.
Go to more writers’ meetings.
9.
Get a Twitter account.
10.
Try submitting to a contest now and then. This one’s low on my list—I
avoid contests like I avoid blue cheese—but I probably should give it a try.
(Contests, not blue cheese.)
Paul D. Marks. I
resolve to watch fewer murder shows on Discovery ID and murder more people on
paper.
Barb Goffman. My new year's resolution is to finish all my
projects early. Anyone who knows me is likely rolling with laughter now because
finishing on time is usually a push for me. Heck I'm often writing my
SleuthSayers column right before the deadline, and I'm probably sending in this
resolution later than desired too. But at least I'm consistent!
Janice Law. I resolve to start reading a lot of books- and only finish the good ones.
Stephen Ross. My New Year resolution is to FINALLY finish a science fiction short story I started two years ago, but have yet to think of a decent ending!
Steve Liskow. I love short stories but find them very difficult to write. I've resolved that I will write and submit four new short stories in 2019. My other resolution is to lose 15 pounds. That will be tricky since I don't know an English bookie...
Melodie Campbell. This fall, we found out my husband has widespread cancer. He isn't yet retirement age, so this has been a shocking plot twist. In the book of our lives together, we have entered a new chapter.
May
your book be filled with many chapters, and the comforting knowledge that many
more are to come.
Leigh Lundin. Each year my resolution is to make no resolutions. A logical fallacy probably is involved.
Leigh Lundin. Each year my resolution is to make no resolutions. A logical fallacy probably is involved.
R.T. Lawton. I tend not to make New Year’s resolutions anymore. Why? So as to not disappoint myself. At my age, there are fewer things I feel driven to change, and for those circumstances I do feel driven about, I make that decision and attempt regardless of the time of year.
For instance, there is the ongoing weight concern, but I hate dieting or restricting myself from temptation. Other than working out, my idea of a dieting program these days is not using Coke in my evening cocktails. Instead, I’ll merely sip the Jack Daniels or Vanilla Crown Royal straight or on the rocks. Not many calories in ice. On the days I gain a pound (weigh-ins every morning), I can usually guess why. On the days I lose weight, I have no idea why. My best weight loss (usually five pounds at a crack), mostly comes from some health problem I did not anticipate and which involved minimal eating for a few days. Naturally, I’m eating well these days, so we’re back to the temptation thing.
As for any writing and getting published resolutions, that’s a constantly renewable action, however, I can only control the writing and submitting part. The getting published part is up to other people and beyond my control, except for e-publishing.
For those of you making New Year’s resolutions, I wish you much success and hope you meet your goal. And, to spur you on with your commitment, let me know in June how well you did.
Have a great New Year!
Labels:
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Eve Fisher,
Floyd,
Janice Law,
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Steve Liskow
22 December 2018
Why I could never be a Modern Fiction Novel Heroine
(back to humour for Bad Girl. Tis the season for frivolity, after all)
modern heroine of a fiction novel.
Sounds reasonable, but I couldn’t be her. I’m all for ‘suspension of disbelief’ in
fantasy, but my world requires more human elements. To wit:
THINGS THAT BUG ME ABOUT MODERN FICTIONAL HEROINES
1. They look great all the time.
By this I mean: she gets up in the morning,
perfect coiffed. (Not quaffed. Except maybe in my loopy Goddaughter books.) She dons clothes for
her work day. Maybe goes for a jog. And spends absolutely no time in front of the
mirror swabbing on makeup or doing her hair.
Did you ever notice fiction novel heroines look great in the morning without
doing anything? They may have a
shit-load of angst about their personal lives, but apparently, they have Barbie
doll hair.
As of immediately, name of heroine is
changed to Barbie.
2. They never eat.
Oh, they got out to dinner a lot. You may even hear them order food. But when it comes, do they ever eat it? No! Barbie is far too busy arguing with her
dinner companion, and then getting upset.
So many books, so many meals where our
intrepid plucky heroine says, “oh my, I’m so upset, I couldn’t eat a thing.”
What is it with these feeble women who
can’t eat? Who the hell are they? What do they exist on?
When I’m upset, I eat, dammit. Gotta fuel up for the famine that’s going to
come sometime in the next 400 years.
If I hear another TSTL (too stupid to live) heroine say she’s
too upset to eat, I’m going to shove the virtual dinner in her vapid virtual
face and watch her choke to death.
Oh. But then someone would have
to rescue her.
EAT THE DAMN MEAL.
3. They
never go to the bathroom.
Twenty-four hours a day, we’re with this
dame. Does she ever go to the loo? I mean, for other than a quick swipe of
lipstick and a gabfest with friends?
Do none of these women have periods?
Do they not have to offload some by-products? EVER?
Oh right.
Barbie is always too upset to eat a thing. Therefore, nothing to offload. What was I
thinking?
HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE!
4. They run into the haunted house.
“Oh, a haunted house!” says our plucky heroine.
(Note use of the word ‘plucky’ to demonstrate she’s not a chicken <sic>) “I’ll just pop in there and see what the fuss
is all about, shall I?”
WHOMP
(Plucky heroines taste good with ketchup,
in my parodies.)
Listen up, modern day heroines! Do NOT be so
stupid as to walk into an abandoned place where you know someone was murdered, or even
stupider, confront the murderer, all by your little selves!
Let it be known: when I am pretty sure I
know who the killer is, I do NOT confront him all on my own in an isolated
location. Instead, I pretty much run
like hell in the opposite direction. ‘Cause
experience has taught me (apparently, I do this a lot) that if someone has
killed once, they won’t hesitate to bop my bean. Even Barbie with half a brain can figure out it
ain’t a smart move.
Modern day heroines, rise up! Rebel against
these tired tropes! Fight back against
the lazy mucks who make you appear as dumb as dough.
GO ON STRIKE AGAINST YOUR AUTHORS! Or alternatively, strike your authors.
I’ll leave now.
Author disclosure: Just so you know, Gina Gallo of The
Goddaughter series loves her food.
You’ll see her eat it. She sneaks
off to the bathroom (offstage, so don’t freak.)
She looks like shit in the morning. Just like me. Even Rowena of my fantasy books goes to the
outhouse and enjoys her meals. (Not at
the same time.)
Labels:
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Location:
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