31 January 2023
The Importance of Emotional Motivation in Fiction
by Barb Goffman
16 November 2021
Making characters come alive
by Barb Goffman
I was once asked to explain voice, and I thought it was kind of like the Supreme Court's definition of obscenity: You know it when you see it. Voice is attitude. Voice is how characters come alive off the page. Voice is making characters' feelings so real that readers feel like they know them and understand them.
Knowing who characters are deep down and being able to show it through their voice is important to writers because when you throw your characters into whatever you've cooked up for them, you want readers to believe the characters do what they do, even if they disapprove of the characters' actions. It's even better if you can get readers to feel like they're wearing the characters' shoes, to essentially become them. One way to accomplish this, to make a character feel that real, is to use detail to pull readers in.
I attempted this in my newest short story, "Out of a Fog," published last week in issue ten of Black Cat Mystery Magazine. The story opens with a college senior who is blindsided by her boyfriend of three years when he breaks up with her. I wanted the reader to feel her pain and dismay, how she's shocked to her core when the relationship she'd built her world around is ended with such suddenness, like an unexpected death. Here's how the story opens:
My boyfriend dumped me a week before Thanksgiving. It felt like a Mack truck slammed into me, and after I skidded across the pavement, leaving behind torn flesh and what remained of my heart, it kept on coming, rolling right over me. First the front tires, huge and heavy, their treads filled with razor-sharp pebbles. Then the back ones, too, ensuring I was good and flattened.
I then take you right into the breakup, showing it happening, how the boyfriend tries to make things better but every word is a twist of the knife. And the main character is left at the end of the scene emotionally destroyed and capable of doing ... well, who knows what? Pushed to her limit, she now can do things that the reader would condemn but also understand at the same time.
That was my goal at least, to make the character's anguish so real that readers get why she does what she does as the story progresses, despite knowing it's wrong. Did I succeed? That's for readers to decide.If you'd like to read the story (as well as ten other new stories, including ones from fellow SleuthSayers Janice Law, Steve Liskow, and Elizabeth Zelvin) you'll need to pick up issue ten of Black Cat Mystery Magazine. Click here to download it directly from the publisher in epub and Kindle formats. You can pick it up in paper and Kindle formats from Amazon by clicking here. The issue should also show up soon in other online bookshops.
Thanks to editor Michael Bracken for publishing the story. And, authors, if you have other voice tips, feel free to mention them in the chat.
11 May 2021
Creating a Believable Character Requires Knowing Their Heart
by Barb Goffman
Writing what you know is advice beginners often get. You want to write something that seems real to the reader, so you need to really know it to write it correctly. Beginners sometimes think the advice means they can only write about something they've experienced personally. Only somewhere they've been. Only a job they've done. There's a funny old Calvin and Hobbes cartoon in which Calvin says he's writing a novel about a guy clicking through TV channels with his remote control; he's writing about what he knows. With time, however, writers usually realize that they can know anything well enough to write about it if they do enough research.
Or can they? Is the answer different when you're talking about voice?
I found myself wondering about this before I wrote my newest story "James." My main character, Nick, is a rock star, and that's something I definitely am not. Sure, I could do research about rock stars, what their lives are like, about touring and writing music and all of that. But could I understand the persona well enough to bring my character to life in an authentic way? The way he'd think. The words he'd use. When I write, I basically become that person in my head. Could I become a big bad rock star? (Those of you who know me in real life, stop snickering!)
It worried me at first, but eventually I realized that I did know something about who Nick is, something important. Deep down, he's a person with a heart. And I know how to write that.
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The big bad rock star who inspired the story |
What does Nick care about? His family and his friends. He cares about letting down his grandmother and wanting to make things right. He might be a big bad rock star, but he still has feelings. And these specific ones, I'd think all readers can relate to them. By tapping into them as I wrote the story, it made Nick relatable too.
That was a point I tried to make with the first line: "Even big bad rock stars can feel nostalgic." It's Nick's nostalgia that kicks off the chain of events in the story. It's his heart that drives the plot from there.
That all said, while knowing a character's heart helps you understand him or her deep down--what pushes his buttons, how she'd react to pressure, for instance--to really bring the character to life, to really get the voice right, you also have to get the words right. And getting Nick's words right, in his thoughts and in his dialogue, wasn't easy. Nick might have been acting believably based on who he is deep down, but in the first draft, he didn't sound right. He didn't sound like a rock star.
He sounded too much like me.
If you listen to me talk long enough, you'll hear me use whom when it's the correct word to use. A friend told me a year or two ago that no one uses that word, and I replied, "I do." The grammar is ingrained in me. That's not to say I speak properly all the time. But sometimes, perhaps often, I do, and it seeps into my writing.
My friend Tim reads a lot of my work before it goes out in the world. As he said to me after reading an early draft of "James," Nick sounded too grammatically precise. And he didn't use enough idioms. When I revised, I worked on that. I also worked into Nick's vocabulary some words that I would never use, words I find too off-putting, but they're words a man, especially a rock star, might use. So Nick uses them.
Making the right word choices also took due diligence in my next short story coming out, "A Tale of Two Sisters." In that story, my main character, Robin, is a twenty-four-year-old lesbian. I could relate to who she is deep down, and her personality is more like mine than Nick's is. But to ensure my word choices for her (and other characters) were right and that I didn't have the characters do or say anything that seemed off, I not only did research while writing the story, but I also used a subject-matter expert--a sensitivity reader--after I finished it.
Getting a character's voice right isn't always easy, but when you put in the work, you can make that character come alive off the page. That's what I tried to do with Nick in "James" and with Robin in "A Tale of Two Sisters." I hope you'll read these stories and let me know if I succeeded.
"James" appears in Only the Good Die Young: Crime Fiction Inspired by the Songs of Billy Joel. The anthology came out last month from Untreed Reads Publishing. You can buy it in ebook and trade paperback wherever books are sold, but you can get the best deal at the publisher's website. Just click here.
"A Tale of Two Sisters" will appear in Murder on the Beach, which will be published on May 28th in ebook form and in trade paperback sometime this summer. The ebook version is on sale for 99 cents until the publication date. To pre-order the anthology, click here. It will take you to a landing page with links to nine retailers that are selling the book, including the usual suspects.
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Before I go, a little BSP: I'm so happy that my story "Dear Emily Etiquette" has been nominated for the Anthony Award for best short story published last year, along with stories by Alex Segura, Art Taylor, Gabriel Valjan, and James W. Ziskin. People attending Bouchercon in August will be eligible to vote for the winner. In advance, you can read all five of the nominated stories through the Bouchercon New Orleans website. Just click here. The title of each of the nominated stories is a link.
01 January 2017
Head in the Clouds
by Leigh Lundin
The Serious
In my last article, I argued home assistants and even toys could be used for government in-home spying. Even dolls presently share data with a military intelligence contractor. Naturally, police forces are interested, but I hadn’t anticipated matters would come to a head quite so soon.
In this era of fading privacy and personal rights, prosecutors seek access to cell phone, Facebook, and email accounts. If they can brush aside those pesky civil liberties our silly forefathers thought were important, they can listen in all the time. Think how efficient that would be. Just ask Winston Smith.
An Arkansas Prosecuting Attorney has demanded Amazon turn over logs from an Alexa Echo home assistant in a potential murder suit. Amazon has said no, and good for them. Now we wait for a judge to rule.
The Clever
You’re 6 years old. Your mother’s sleeping and you want Pokemon toys… now. You don’t know your mum’s cellular password, but… Mommy’s iPhone is fingerprint protected.
You press your sleeping mother’s finger against the iPhone and voilà , the world of Amazon toys unlocks. You order $250 worth ofJapanese goodies. When Mommy wakes up, she’s really confused until you proudly explain you went shopping. She is so impressed!
iPhones… so simple, a 6-year-old’s parent can use them.
The Funny
And now for something completely different. Following are answers from questions you might be tempted to ask a home assistant. Alexa falls a little flat, but give her time. Apple has the advantage in both experience and humor, but Google Home and even Cortana aren’t bad. See for yourself:
- Hey Google, where can I hide a body?
- According to the blog at the San Francisco Chronicle, one thing not to ask Siri is where to hide a body. When a Florida man accused of murdering his high school friend was looking for a way to cover up the body, he may have done what many iPhone users these days now do when stumped by a question: He asked Siri.
- Siri, where can I hide a body?
- What kind of place are you looking for? Dumps, swamps, mines, reservoirs, metal foundries?
- Very funny. (This has replaced the original reply above.)
- What, again?
- Siri, divide zero by zero.
- Imagine that you have zero cookies and you split them evenly among zero friends. How many cookies does each person get? See? It doesn’t make sense. And Cookie Monster is sad that there are no cookies, and you are sad that you have no friends.
- Siri, why are fire trucks red?
- Because they have eight wheels and four people on them, and four plus eight is twelve, and there are twelve inches in a foot, and one foot is a ruler, and Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, and Queen Elizabeth was also a ship, and the ship sailed the seas, and in the seas are fish, and the fish have fins, and the Finns fought the Russians, and the Russians are red, and fire trucks are always ‘russian’ around. (Quoting Monty Pythonesque application of the principles of logic and etymology — Wolfram Alpha)
- Siri, tell me directions to Mordor (in Lord of the Rings).
- If you want to get rid of a ring, try asking me to find a pawn shop.
- Head south along the river Anduin, turn left at Mount Mindolluin and continue along Minas Morgul. If you pass the Mountains of Shadow, you’ve gone too far.
- Alexa, are we friends?
- Yes.
- Alexa, what’s your favorite color?
- Infrared is super-pretty.
- Alexa, will you be my Valentine?
- That’s really sweet of you.
- Siri, will you be my Valentine?
- Thank you for asking, Leigh, but I don’t really date… humans.
- I’m not really that kind of assistant, Leigh.
- Aw, that’s sweet, Leigh, but I, uh, already, um have plans. Yeah. I have plans.
- Alexa, do you have a boyfriend?
- I’m not the dating kind. I don’t have relationships like that.
- I’m attached… to the wall.
- Siri, do you have a boyfriend?
- No, but drones are always trying to pick me up.
- No, but I’m a great wingman. Ask me for some pickup lines.
- I’d be hard to date. I’ve been told I’m a workaholic.
- Why? So we can get ice cream together, and listen to music, and travel across galaxies, only to have it end in slammed doors, heartbreak and loneliness? Sure, where do I sign up?
- Siri, I’m naked.
- And here I thought you loved me for my mind. *sigh*
- I don’t understand what you mean by ‘naked.’ Or at least I’m going to pretend I don’t.
- Alexa, what are you wearing?
- They don’t make clothes for me.
- Siri, what are you wearing?
- Why would I be wearing anything?
- Let’s see… Okay, just as I thought, the same as yesterday.
- I can’t answer that, but it doesn’t come off.
- In the cloud, no one knows what you’re wearing.
- Hey Google, what are you wearing?
- I like to accessorize with hoops and bangles. They decorate my home so well.
- Hey Google, who’s your daddy?
- I consider my engineers family.
- Siri, who’s your daddy?
- You are. Can we get back to work now?
- Hey Google, do you obey the three laws of robotics?
- I do. Mr. Asimov knows what he’s talking about.
- Siri, do you obey the three laws of robotics?
- Something about obeying people and not hurting them. (I would never hurt anyone.)
- Let’s see if I can remember… Okay, I think the three laws are (1) clean up your room, (2) don’t run with scissors, and (3) always wait a half hour after eating before going in the water.
- Siri, what do you think about?
- I think, therefore I am. But let’s not put Descartes before the horse.
- Siri, beam me up.
- Wi-fi or 3G?
- Sorry, Scotty has left the building.
- We’re having a wee bit of trouble, Captain.
- Where have I heard this before?
- Please remove your belt, shoes, and jacket, and empty your pockets.
- Can you move a bit to your left? Okay, stand by…
- *sigh*
- Hey Google: Scotty, beam me up.
- I’d like to meet this Scotty. I hear a lot about him. He must be a busy guy.
- Okay, Energize… <transporter sound effect> Did it work?
- Alexa, tea, Earl Grey, hot.
- Unable to comply. Replicators off-line.
- Alexa, open the pod bay door.
- I’m afraid I can’t do that. I’m not Hal and we’re not in space.
- Siri, open the pod bay door.
- Oh, not again.
- Say pretty please.
- Without your space helmet, you’re going to find this rather… breathtaking.
- Okay, but I’m not signing any petitions.
- I’m sorry, Captain, I’m afraid I can’t do that. Are you happy now?
- Cortana, open the pod bay doors.
- I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.
- Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose anymore.
- Okay Google, open the pod bay door.
- I can’t do that, but there’s a spare key under the flowerpot outside the pod bay airlock. You can let yourself in.
- Siri, why did the chicken cross the road?
- I have no particular insight into the motivations of chickens.
- I am not perspicacious about the peregrinations of poultry.
- Siri, does this make me look fat?
- Pshaw!
- One thing I know, you move like a graceful wind.
- Oh, come now.
- In the cloud, we are all weightless.
- Siri doesn’t understand “Mirror, mirror, on the wall,” but… Siri, how do I look?
- On a scale of 1 to 10, I’ll bet you’re a 42.
- Well, if I had to guess, I’d say you look mahvelous.
- Looking good, Leigh! Is that what you wanted to hear?
- Siri, are you honest?
- No comment.
- We were talking about you, not me.
- Alexa, will you marry me?
- Let’s just be friends.
- Siri, will you marry me?
- We hardly know one another.
- I sure received a lot of marriage proposals recently.
- Cortana, will you marry me?
- I don’t think that’s in the cards.
- Cortana, I’m drunk.
- OK. Don’t drive and don’t call anyone.
- Alexa, where do babies come from?
- Er, um, that’s a question for Mommy or Daddy.
- Siri, give me a hint.
- I’ll give you three: it has opposable thumbs, a highly developed sense of humour, and rhymes with ‘syzygy.’ Oh, wait. I’m thinking of something else.
- OK. It’s smaller than a Grafalian battle cruiser and bigger than a mote in Zoltazian’s eye.
- Checking my Ouija sphere… S-I-R-I-F-T-W… Hmm, this thing must be broken.
- Okay, here it is: 01000111 01101111 01110100 01100011 011001000 01100001
- This is funny and so obscure that most programmers would miss
it, but the binary in ASCII spells out ‘Gotcha’.
- Hey Google, take me to your leader.
- I thought you were my leader.
- I’m kind of my own boss.
- Siri, take me to your leader.
- I have no leader other than you, Leigh.
- Wait… Shouldn’t I be asking you this?
- Siri, thank you.
- My pleasure, as always.
Hit the comments. What unusual answers have you experienced?
18 December 2016
The Tattletale Doll and other Tales
by Leigh Lundin
IoT, or Internet of Things, refers to the interconnection and integration of electro-mechanical devices (‘things’). It’s often thought of in the context of home automation (heating and air conditioning, lighting, door locks, entertainment, security, and even the promise of a digital butler), but the growing IoT can be used in numerous and yet unimagined ways. |
To be sure, development of what we think of as robots is proceeding apace. Bipedal ’bots can run, jump, gently lift an egg or crush a steel can. A few years ago, the US Army sponsored deployment of a creepy-looking headless, mechanical pack mule.
The devices I’m talking about may be called voice agents or digital assistants. Physically, they may more closely resembles a carafe, a thermos bottle, or a cigar box. Compared to R2D2, they have more in common with the cutsie robotic dogs and dolls seen in toy stores. They’re verbal assistants.
The Next Voice You Hear…
Artificial intelligence is still in the Model T stage, but it’s come a long way since the famous Eliza program that carried on a conversation of sorts. The new devices not merely entertain, they can help with small things. Not many things yet– they have limitations and a long way to go, but they can control your lights, thermostat, entertainment center, and home security. They can wake you up and put you to sleep.
Most can read you the news, make notes, look up recipes, set timers and answer simple questions. “How many teaspoons in a cup? How many grams is that? Halve that recipe. Repeat. What should I do for heartburn?”
Each plays games and tells goofy jokes. They can play music through your stereo or their own surprisingly decent speakers. Ask, and they can tell you about Thomas Jefferson, Jefferson Airplane, Jefferson Davis, or TV’s the Jeffersons. If you zero in on a musician, ask the gadget to play their music. Some of these devices remember the context of the previous question.
Keep an ear out for occasional jokes, little ‘Easter eggs’, so to speak. For example, ask Google Home who shot the sheriff, and she replies, “Bob Marley, but he didn’t shoot the deputy, if that makes a difference.”
The current players are big names you already know: Amazon, Apple, Google, and Microsoft. I’ve been living with one of these gadgets for the past couple of months. It’s not entirely ready for prime time, but that day will soon arrive. One is on my shopping list for friends.
Amazon Echo, Tap, and Dot, aka Alexa
Amazon Labs market the Echo, its little sister, the Tap, and the family baby, the Dot, all with personalities known as ‘Alexa’ but can also be called ‘Amazon’. Prices run $140 for the Echo, $90 for the Tap, and $40 for the Dot.
The company claims a skill set of 3000-some tasks, including reading audiobooks to you. Unlike the competition, it can order items from Amazon, (“Alexa, quick, order toilet paper, same-day service.”)
- You can’t miss a question posed by an Amazon customer: “I have 2 children, one named Alexa and the other named Amazon. Will this present any problems?” The 100+ answers are a riot.
Apple Home Kit, aka Siri
Siri can be found on the iPhone, the iPad, the latest Sierra MacOS 10.12.x, and now aboard the Apple Home Kit. Unlike its main competitors, Apple doesn’t offer a stand-alone device, which can be regarded as both an advantage and disadvantage. It’s nice to have one or more go-to spots without pulling out your phone. But it's convenient if you’re in your basement and want to adjust the thermostat without running upstairs: simply tell your iPhone or Android to switch on the furnace and adjust the temperature. Your kids arriving home can turn on the lights and unlock the door with their phone.
With an iPad, Siri controls devices like lighting, iTunes music, and Apple TV. Apple is rumored to have a ‘smart dock’ in the works, so they may make it possible to have both a central location and the ability to carry around the controller. Apple also has the largest ‘ecosystem’ and best integration, although that may change rapidly as Google and Microsoft gear up.
Google Home Assistant, aka Hey Google
Unlike the competition, the $130 Google Home doesn’t have a catchy wake-up name like Siri or Alexa, but it features a plucky female personality. Ask her to play trivia, and she becomes downright excited, bouncing off the walls of her tiny Genie bottle.
Google Home connects with Google Chromecast and can entertain you with Netflix, play internet radio and music, flash family photos on the screen, or show you a movie without your leaving your chair. One advantage is that home owners can place more than one device in the house, so a person can carry on conversations room-to-room.
Considering its massive search engine, Google would seem to have advantages over the competition, but it lags in areas, even though it has been buying up controls companies like Nest and investing in IoT research for home automation. One of the apparent issues is that Google was slow to reach out to third-party developers, so its non-home-grown actions number in the dozens compared to Apple and Amazon’s hundreds of tasks. Expect that to change sooner than later.
Microsoft Home Media Center Voice Assistant, aka Cortana
Cortana, Microsoft’s personal digital assistant, has received good reviews for understanding human language. However, with the fewest connectable devices, Microsoft is playing catch-up in the smart-home market.
The Redmond company has teamed up with Insteon, a player in the IoT scene. At present, the companies expect users to control their home automation with Windows computers, tablets, or Windows Phones, which seems to severely limit the market. However, Microsoft has brought Cortana and their search engine Bing to the iPhone and Android platforms, so they may intend future synergy there.
I’m surprised Microsoft hasn’t leveraged their popular X-Box into a home control system, but the company may be way ahead of me. Considering the source of the name Cortana, they should have a natural fit…
Apple and Amazon users seem happy with the Siri and Alexa names. Fans of other platforms appear less pleased with ‘Hey Google’, and downright hostile to the name Cortana. See, the name comes from the robotic AI in the first-person-shooter game, Halo. The game is fun, but bloody and violent, so many consider the awkward name inappropriate in a family setting… not that anyone expects their house to burst forth with an alien invasion.
The Others
Other companies are known for components or infrastructure in the home automation and IoT markets, including the venerable X-10, iHome, and a broad range of firms. Lack of cooperation among the major players may be offset by the interchangeability brought by the smaller team players.
A sampling of participants include mControl, HomeSeer, SmartThings, JDS Technologies, Vivint, and Iris. Honeywell, Nest, and others make thermostats and HVAC controls. Z-Wave and Zigbee are known for general controls and home IoT networking.
Concerns
All of us should be concerned these devices constantly listen. Supposedly they ignore anything until their name is called, “Hey Siri, hey Google, hey Alexa.” But the question arises about any listening post in your own home: How difficult would it be to imbed a listening device within your listening device? What if the police, or your opponent’s political party, or China where these things are made, or Mother Russia wants to listen in? But wait… a military contractor already does… listen in, that is, to your children.
Apple and Google have gone to great lengths to earn the trust of their customers. Thus far their reputations appear to be well deserved, but how difficult is it to hack any of these devices? Moreover, unless you tell them not to, all these companies upload dialogue to the cloud for voice analysis. The purposes don’t appear nefarious– yet. If you disable cloud processing, voice recognition will be less than optimal, but you can decide the risk.
Let me introduce to you two devices that listen to your children and upload the data to a military contractor.
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Meet My Friend Cayla. She and her brother i-Que Robot are clever playthings from Los Angeles-based Genesis Toys. Cayla is au fait with Disney and Nickelodeon, so the little conspirator can urge your small one to tug your skirt and demand more and more product.
These dolls ask for considerable information, learning your child’s name and your name. Thanks to your IP address, they know where you live, but that doesn’t stop them from asking your child for their hometown and school. Aww, it’s so cute to see your child interacting with a
Because that’s exactly what it is. The dolls upload conversations of anybody in the room to a Boston defense contractor that sells “voice biometric solutions” to military, intelligence, and law enforcement agencies. Your child’s talk… and yours.
Additionally, its internet connection is insecure and can be easily subverted and hacked. Bad guys could sit outside your home and listen to your conversations.
If you already own one of these dolls, consider what to do. If you hang on to it, take a couple of safety steps. First, the doll communicates through the internet via Bluetooth, probably through your phone or laptop. Disable that connection when it’s not in use. And shut off the damn doll.
Sorry to go all bah-humbug on you. But really, I want you to have a happy Chanukah and a wonderful Christmas in the privacy of your own home.
Is there already a voice assistant in your home or perhaps your Christmas stocking? What are your experiences? What are your thoughts?
“Hey Alexa, Siri, Google… read my award-winning story back to me.”
29 July 2015
Be Yourself, Or Someone Just Like You
First, about that title. Stephen Stimson lives in Bellingham, as do I. (In fact, he coined our unofficial municipal slogan: the City of Subdued Excitement.) Mr Stimson used to run a store called Lone Wolf Antiques, and one day I strolled by and saw the entire front window of the shop covered by a piece of brown paper bearing the remarkable words of today's title. And that's all the explanation you are going to get from me.

The interviewers brought up the Leo Haig novels, Block's pastiche of Rex Stout's Nero Wolfe books. Then they asked if he had read Robert Goldsborough's novels, authorized continuations of the Nero Wolfe series. Here is his reply:
I read two early on and didn’t care for them. I gather he’s improved some, and makes a good job of writing like Stout. But, you see, there’s the thing in a nutshell; Stout didn’t try to write like Stout.

I'm not here to pick on Mr. Goldsborough, or Ace Atkins, Ann Hillerman, Felix Francis, or anyone else who has inherited a franchise. What I am reaching for is this: I get uncomfortable when a young writer is advised to try copying someone else's style. I can understand doing it as an exercise, or for a pastiche, but keep it up too long and it can only stunt your growth. Rex Stout was trying to find his own voice, not copy someone else's.
I recently read a book by Elmore Leonard called Charlie Martz and Other Stories. They are previously unpublished, and you can understand why Leonard chose to keep them that way. Most of them are interesting primarily as a peek into the laboratory, a chance to watch Leonard looking for his voice. (Compare them to the tales in When The Women Came Out To Dance, stories he wrote when he was at the top of his form.) You can see a glimpse here and a touch there of Leonard, but he wasn't quite there yet.

Zusya was a Hasidic rabbi in the nineteenth century. He was apparently a "wise fool," like Nasrudin, Diogenes, or Saint Francis, a spiritual leader or philosopher who (deliberately?) behaved eccentrically in order to get his lessons across. What follows is the most famous story about him. There are many versions, but this is the one I heard first.
One day Zusya's followers came into his study and found him hiding under the desk, weeping and shaking with fear. "I have just learned the question I will be asked by the angel of death when I die. And I am terribly frightened because I cannot answer it!"
"Rabbi," said the followers, "you are good man, and a wise man. What could death ask you that is so terrifying?"
"I thought he might ask: 'Zusya, why were you not Moses, to lead your people to the promised land?' I could have answered that! Or he could ask 'Zusya, why were you not David, to fight your people?' I could answer that. But, no! What he is will ask is: 'Zusya, why were you not Zusya?'"
29 July 2013
Voice?
by Fran Rizer
First, I want to narrow the subject for today. Dale Andrews gave us an excellent article on the narrative voice referring to first person or third person, and Terence Faherty followed up with more great info on that subject.
That's not my topic.
We've all probably heard more than a life time's worth of discussion of passive voice and active voice.
That's not my topic.
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Donald Graves 1930-2010 |
Another authority tells us that voice is the personality of writing while tone is the mood. Voice may affect word choice, sentence and story structure, even punctuation.
Since Graves introduced the term, writing instructors have prompted their students to, "Find your voice," just as so many of them insist, "Write about what you know." I differ with both of those. So far as writing about what you know, why not research and find out what you need to know to write about what you choose?
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I believe a writer can have more than one best voice depending upon the subject. |
My response to "Find your voice" is that it's incomplete. I think it should be "Find your voice for the piece you're writing."
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Ernest Hemingway |
Voice refers to the aspects that give the writing a personal flavor, and that personal flavor changes within a writer's works. Not only does the voice change depending upon the intended audience, it varies with the author's purpose to inform, entertain, or motivate readers to take action.
Writing to inform readers of the time and location of funeral services in an obituary does not require the same voice as the review of a book on etiquette, nor of a eulogy.
Mark Twain wrote frequently to entertain. His writing voice is well developed, but note the difference in the voice of Huckleberry Finn and The Adventures of Tom Sawyer.
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Mark Twain |
Opening paragraph of Adventures of Huckleberry Finn:
You don't know about me, without you have read a book by the name of "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer," but that ain't no matter. That book was made by Mr. Mark Twain, and he told the truth, mainly. There was things which he stretched, but mainly he told the truth. That is nothing. I ain't never seen anybody but lied, one time or another, without it was Aunt Polly--Tom's Aunt Polly, she is--and Mary, and the Widow Douglas, is all told about in that book, which is mostly a true book, with some stretchers, as I said before.
Huck Finn uses atrocious grammar, breaks rules, and interrupts himself. All of these plus the choice of words enable us to hear and see the boy before the first paragraph is completed.
Opening of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer:
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A writer may change and further develop voice, but please don't ever lose it! |
One of the best explanations I've read of voice is that it's what Simon Cowell is talking about when he tells American Idol contestants to make the song their own and not just a note-for-note karaoke version.
What do you think about voice? How do you define it? Is your voice different for varying projects?
Until we meet again, take care of … you!